


A lovely, lovely school

by the_great_nagi



Category: Dangan Ronpa
Genre: Child Abuse, Death, Depression, Learning Disabilities, Multi, Murder, Mutual Killing, Transphobia, Verbal Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-12
Updated: 2014-11-14
Packaged: 2018-02-25 02:07:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2604638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_great_nagi/pseuds/the_great_nagi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yumiko Kurosawa was invited to Hope's Peak Academy...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. It all started with a HUGE EXPLOSION!

Ah, the life of a comedian is never easy. Ask Yumiko Kurosawa.

Most people didn't know her as the particularly funny type. In normal life, she just seemed a bit dull and boring. She wasn't really anything special, to the common person, but onstage she was like a different Yumiko Kurosawa altogether. She was a famous woman, and now, she would only get better. A letter came to her home, closed with wax in an envelope. She was the SHSL Comedian, invited to Hope's Peak Academy.

Here she was, at the door, tugging at her dingy, white turtleneck. This was nerve-wracking as fuck. She had always been a small-town girl, not the type to go to these prestigious boarding school. 

She pushed the door open with her spotty, pale hands, and...Huh, the world suddenly went all blurry. She turned on her heel towards the door, trying to walk back out. But nope, whatever drug that had been administered was already taking hold.

She passed out, halfway through the door.

\--

"Ugh...Fffffuck..."

She grabbed her thighs, pulling into a sitting position. This position left incomprehensible cramps in the legs...

She stared at the clock. Fuck. The letter said she should be at the gym by 9 on the first day, and it was already 8:45. She got up and ran into the eerily empty and ominous hallways, navigating for the auditorium using the weird signs on the walls.

With a mighty grunt, she pushed the door open, stirring up quite a bit of attention. About twenty-three other kids stared at her.

"Uh...hi?"

"Pft, some comedian!" A pale girl with silvery hair crossed her arms and scoffed. "All of you funnymen are the same. You and your cheap laughs!" Another person with brightly-colored hair and a set of binoculars stepped up.

"You are the funny one, yes? Give us the extravagant entrance! If you beat Xoxo, you win the Xoxo's Grand Entrance Game."

"Hah! All you did was spread gunk and confetti all over the floor and walls, you nasty child."

"Thirteen isn't a child, fuckface! I'm just a little genius! You'll get forehead wrinkles first, anyway."

The elder of the two was shocked and dismayed, the brightly-colored child who still managed to be almost her height sticking their tongue out. They hopped away on their platform boots, which probably explains their unrealistic height.

Yumiko was confused, to say the least.

"...Who are you people?"

"Who am I?" The pale woman flipped her hair. "How do you not know? I'm Viola Ashworth, greatest playwright in Europe."

_Viola Ashworth : SHSL Playwright_

She feels as though she's heard the name Viola Ashworth. Writer of many tragic plays, Viola was world-famous, and all of her works were liked by the general public for their dark stories, but still safe themes.

"Boring!" A freckled boy with short, brown hair stepped up. "Miss Ashworth always plays it safe with her stories, isn't that boring? I want a story that breaks the boundaries!"

"Haaah! You're back again, Bellamy. Here to mock my profession, I see. Go speak with the other scum babies and leave me be."

Yumiko was...confused, again. She had no clue who any of these people fucking were.

"Uh...who the hell is this?"

Viola rolled her eyes, pulling the boy down to her level by his necktie.

"Ludovic Bellamy, SHSL Trashbag."

_Ludovic Bellamy : SHSL Musical Actor_

"Oh, come on, Miss Ashworth. I know L.O.A.I. doth sway thine life, yes?"

"I'd love to see you humiliate yourself in yellow stockings and cross-garters, but not as much as I'd love to not see you at all." She pushed Bellamy away, and he skittered off to do whatever it is Ludovic Bellamy does. Honestly, Yumiko hated them both already.

Oh, and the technicolor gremlin was back. Xoxo, was it?

"Hey, kid."

"Sup, bitchtits?" They giggled, showing a big space between their headgear-braced teeth. "All's good in the neighborhood here. Tell me you're not a fuckin' nerd though, goddamn, these freaks are killin' me!"

"D...did a baby just call me bitchtits?"

"I ain't a baby! I'm jus' a funsized paranormal investigator, understood?"

_Xoxo Vaughn : SHSL Paranormal Investigator_

"...Yeah, okay." Yumiko hauled ass away from Xoxo as fast as possible. So fast, in fact, that she ran into...someone familiar.

The familiar person stared down at her with a happy expression. He was standing next to another person even taller than him, and with a model body that could make any lady jealous. For her English studies, Yumiko had found herself watching many an American 90's cartoon. That was definitely Rolf, no doubt about it.

"Hello, Missy." He grinned widely, his teeth misaligned and dirty. "How now, brown cow?"

"Oh, Buttercup, hush. You're going to confuse her. She's like a little doe in the headlights!"

She recognized the name immediately.

"J-Jenny Buttercup, the Novoselician cartoon animator? You're here?!"

"Aha! Aha! Another fan! I told you, Coco, I do have fans overseas."

The person next to him rolled her eyes and brushed back her hair. 

"Whatever..."

_Jenny Buttercup : SHSL Cartoon Animator_

Yumiko was familiar with Buttercup's works due to their widespread popularity. His style was very swoopy and curvy, and every one of his works was very strange and surreal. It was an acquired taste, but many people loved his art, animation, storytelling, characterization and sense of humor. What people didn't know was that he was only sixteen. Hell, Yumiko thought he was at least in his thirties.

"I am Coco--"

_"Put the introductions on hold, woof! We're currently lowering the building, woof!"_

A voice came through the intercom. Yumiko cocked her head. Lowering the building? What the hell is that supposed to mean? And...why was the person over the intercom barking? That's certainly not normal in the least. Then, the ground began to shake...

With that, the auditorium disappeared, doors and all.


	2. Welcome to Inumami City

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The children are freed...Or are they, really?

The walls didn't really fall, more they just sort of disappeared, giving way to the sight of a massive city. There were buildings and buildings towering above one another, all of them painted a gentle pastel pink.

A magenta glow shone in the center of the room...and out of it came a chihuahua.

"Woah! I-is that a rabbit?!"

"No, no, rabbit's noses don't look like that."

"How peculiar!"

"Where are we?"

"What happened to Hope's Peak?"

"My li'l fairies!" The skirt-wearing, cartoony puppy spread its arms out. "There's no need to be upsetted, woof woof. Just take this at face value, my little pixie babies. Get to know each other nice 'n good, okay?"

"Wait a moment, you stupid animal!" Viola stamped her foot, enraged. "Where have you taken us?!"

"Oh, right. That. Welcome to Inumami City, named after me, Inumami, woof." Inumami waved their...paw around. "Now go make friends, my fiery infants of love!" 

"That told me absolutely nothing!" The enraged playwright continued stomping all over the pavement. "Tell me why you took me here or I'll rip your head off!"

"Oooh! Cold, Viola...It's really not important, make friends, make merry, woof!"

"I can't just calm down, what do you want from me?!"

But Inumami was already gone.

"...I dunno where we are, but I like it!" Xoxo was already preoccupied, staring in "store" windows. Yumiko sighed. Okay, so...this was weird, but she's always been the adaptable type, so she'd make the best of it somehow. She reached in her pocket, for her cell phone...Wait, that's thicker than a phone. She didn't put her DS in her pocket, what the hell...?

"Inumami City Student ID?"

"Inuwhat-a-who-what?" A person behind Yumiko rubbed her eyes.

"Did you fall asleep?!"

"Seemed like a good idea at the time...I believe in doing what I think is a good idea, and sometimes that's sleeping. If I feel the need to sleep during the day, I should because that probably means I didn't get enough sleep the night before."

"...Okay?"

"My name is Nhung Thị Lý, nice to meet you."

"Can...can I call you Lee, because I didn't understand any of that."

"Nhung."

"Fine."

_Nhung Thị Lý : SHSL Psychologist_

"But, how did you even fall asleep?"

"Narcolepsy."

"So, by 'feel the need to sleep', you mean you just passed out standin' up."

"...Yeah. Who're you? Uh...Kookaburra...?"

"Kurosawa."

"Ah, I see. Well, nice to meet you, Kurosawa-san. Ehm, your giant phone is making noises."

Yumiko looked down into her hand. A giant notification appeared on the ID's screen, which read 'Hope Shard Acquired! New Friend Acquired!' "You appear concerned, Kookaburra-san."

"I-it's nothin'. An' my name is Kurosawa."

"Whatever you say. You should go introduce yourself to the others, you know. Unless you want to be the nameless, tall lady with the braces."

"Yeah, yeah..." She pocketed the ID and scuttled away. When she looked back, Nhung was out cold on the sidewalk. She contemplated carrying her into a building or something, but decided against it. That was her problem.

She found herself in a place marked as Inu Cafe, and entered for some food. First, she noted Bellamy raiding the fridge. It wasn't really much of a cafe if they could just walk up to the fridge like that, was it? She decided to make conversation with a brunette woman in a multitude of bracelets. She sat down at the chair across from her, pulling her newspaper down.

That got the lady's attention.

"W-woah, hey! I didn't see ya there! Got business?"

"...I'm just sayin' hi, do I need to have business?"

"Oh, well, the last three people were askin' me for hand-made jewelery, so...I figured...Yeah."

"Oh, well...Okay, then." This was awkward as fuck.

"...Name's Reuben Maxwell! Nice to meet'cha, honey bun."

_Reuben Maxwell : SHSL Jeweler_

"Cool, Kurosawa Yumiko." Yumiko pushed out of the chair, wanting to get these introductions over with as fast as possible. Maxwell looked dejected, staring down at her toes, but it didn't matter. She wondered if she talked to all these fuckers, the weird talking dog would actually take her to her school.

She had no interests in jewelery, anyway.

The streets were pretty empty, though maybe because 24 little kids weren't enough to fill up a whole city. She wandered the streets, whistling a tune to herself. The wind was blowing heavily down the sidewalks.

Was it this windy earlier today? She supposed, weather was an erratic thing.

She felt a tap on her shoulder.

"I do believe we have yet to be fully acquainted, correct, Comedian?"

"Uh, Coco, right? I'm Yumiko Kurosawa."

"You are the Comedian. I am Coco Something, and I hail from Novoselic, similarly to my comrade the Cartoonist."

_Coco Something : SHSL Fashion Designer_

"...Coco Something?"

"Yes! Do you think my name is odd? I think a name like Yukiko Kumagawa is strange, too!"

"Yumiko Kurosawa."

"Silence, Kumagawa! I'll have you know that I am very important, probably moreso than any brace-ed comedyperson, yes?" Coco crossed her arms.

"Whatever, lady--"

"Ah, ah! There is Comedian's mistake. Coco is no lady, nononono, she is neither lady nor man, but she is more woman than man. Understood?"

"...I can't understand half of what you're sayin'."

"Well, do you understand 'Move out of the way'?"

"Yeah, why--"

BAM!! She got hit head-on by...someone or something. She landed on her back, grunting in pain.

"Deepest apologies, milady! Me and the Fin Fin were playing Wife-carrier! Though I have no wife, I do well nonetheless!"

"Well, watch where you're goin' buddy."

"I apologize! Would you like to be my wife? None of the other ladies wanted to, so I had to make a man my wife! He looks quite nice in a skirt."

"No." She got up, eyeballing the short, chubby-cheeked, freckled brunette. He was grinning like an idiot in a sailor hat and striped t-shirt. On his back was a boy about his size, with dark skin and a bright white turban, clad in a pink dress. "You both look like morons."

"But milady! This is how we play Wife-carrier!"

"That's not even a girl."

"How do you know?"

"You told me he was a guy, Ship Captain Dumbass."

"Oh!" He looked at his 'wife'. "Well then. I am Izanagi Teshima, and this is my temporary wife, Rajendra Gadhavi."

_Izanagi Teshima : SHSL Sailor_

_Rajendra Gadhavi : SHSL Calligraphist_

"Well then, Teshima. Watch where you're goin'! I'm tryin' to talk to Coco Somethin'."

"Deepest apologies once more, but my wife and I forgot where the finish line was!"

Finally, his wife spoke up.

"Martin already passed it, dummy. I've been trying to tell you that for the past twenty minutes!"

"...Oh! Well, let's go congratulate Fin Fin and the Rabbit, shall we? Oh Fiiiiiiiiiiin Fiiiiiiiiiin!"

The five-foot sailor ran off, in search of 'Fin Fin', whoever that was. Yumiko felt a light tap on her shoulder once more. Oh, right, Coco was still there, and getting impatient, it seemed. She looked at least a little angry.

"I must introduce you to the other students, Comedian."

"I was gonna do that mysel-"

"Come with me! We will have a joyous outing, you and I!"

With that, Coco took her hand and ran off in a tizzy.


	3. Coco and Yumiko's Adventures in Inumami

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coco drags a skinny comedian across an unknown city. Huzzah.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for my Google Translate Speak

Her name is Yumiko Kurosawa, and she needs a break from this crazy person.

Coco had taken her hand in a vicegrip and hauled her across Inumami City

The sound of muttering between the buildings could be heard. Coco suddenly pulled her into an alleyway, with the voice of a person whispering to themselves echoing between the buildings.

"나는 집에 가고 싶어, 나는 집에 가고 싶어, 나는 집에 가고 싶어, 나는 집에 가고 싶..."

"Uh, hello?"

"나에게서 떨어져!"

They took a step back, wringing their fingers through their shoddily-bleached hair. Their breath was heavy, even audible from far away, and despite their height, they did appear rather...pathetic.

"I-I apologize...Jeez...You scared the livin' shit outta me, lady..."

"Am I seriously scary? Jesus christ, yer like, six feet tall."

"Yeah, but..." They sighed. "W-whatever, are you here for an introduction? I-I'm not talkin' to anyone 'till I get an answer as to where the hell I am."

Coco piped up, getting right in the stranger's face while doing so.

"But you are speaking to me and my comrade Kumagawa right now!"

"Gh-! You're right! Shit!" They buried their face in their hands, looking as defeated as a person possibly could. "I-I give up! You win! I'm Mi-Sun Park, p-please don't kill me!"

_Mi-Sun Park : SHSL Children's Book Author_

"Now g-g-go away!"

"Parker is a rude child, wouldn't you agree?" Coco crossed her arms, and then grabbed grabbed Yumiko by the hand. "Let's go. There's lots more friends to meet, and there's no need to waste time on this purple doorstop."

"시끄러워..." Park turned back to the wall, biting their lips nervously and muttering to themselves once more. Yumiko contemplated listening in, but Coco was already dragging her off to the next introduction.

The city was much bigger than designer or comedian could have imagined, with many long bridges leading off to other places. However, due to suspicion amongst the students, Yumiko found that all of the others had stayed on the mainland to avoid getting lost, or perhaps, dying. It was understandable, really; being trapped in an unknown city with a strange, talking dog as your only guide is certainly no laughing matter.

"I swear I saw some people all a-bumbling around like drugged queen bees, but they appear to have dispersed! How very odd, wouldn't you agree?"

"Can't you speak in a way where I'll understand you?"

Coco ignored the question, then squealing and hauling Yumiko off to the next place.

"Coco diiiiiiive!"

Yumiko only heard a lot of screaming before the universe spun in hamster-wheel circles, the whites and blues of the sky melting into the greys of the pavement as she tumbled across the streets and sidewalk, still attached to Coco's hand with palm-sweat as thick as tree sap and glue.

When her body stopped bouncing, her free hand moved to her forehead. It was moist, warm, sticky -- she was probably bleeding. A scarlet geyser developed on her hairline as four faces looked down at her, right fist still being held in Coco's firm hand.

"Oof, Brace-Face, you suffered quite a fall. Need some peroxide?" The smallest person spoke.

"Nuhthanks...'m fine..."

"I can do CPR. Candied Pickle Resuscitation." The person to her right piped up in a flat voice.

"All is well, for Kumagawa is 100% alive!"

"Comatose people are alive too--"

She felt something cold and...painful on her forehead wound. The monotone kid appeared to have put something on her head.

"Candied pickles solve everything..."

"Ew, get that away from me." She lightly slapped the stranger, who looked slightly hurt. The pickle fell on the floor, and they picked it up and ate it. Gross. "Anyway, who the fuck are you people."

"Shelby Mitchel...I've caught them all seventeen times over..."

"...Caught what?"

"P...Pokemon."

_Shelby Mitchel : SHSL Pokemon Collector_

"That series is still going?"

"You have no idea..." Shelby grinned, almost a grin of malice. "We're in the seven-hundreds now."

"Really? Shit, I've missed a lot."

"Theeeeere's..."

"Don't sing."

"Bulbasaur and Ivysaur, Venusaur, Charmeleon--"

"Stop."

Shelby looked dejected once more. It wasn't Yumiko's fault that they sucked at singing.

"Well!" The short one, who Yumiko now realized was not only hijab-clad, but wearing one that was printed like an AP lolita dress. "I'm Maryam. Maryam El-Amin, the chemist. Not only is science fun, but I can look cute while doing it!"

_Maryam El-Amin : SHSL Chemist_

"Great for you, Bill Nye."

"Bill Nye!" She perked up immediately. "He's my idol! Kyaaaaaa!"

"...Kya?"

"...Force of habit."

The last person spoke up, sliding his glasses backwards.

"Chemistry, another scientific conspiracy from the government -- It's their fault we haven't found the cure for cancer..."

"Conspiracy? Science is cold hard fact, Jamie!"

"You said that about Colony Collapse Disorder, too. Obviously, it's the Illuminati's work."

_Jamie Jones : SHSL Conspiracy Theorist_

"If Jamie has poo-brain, raise your hand!"

Everyone rose their hand. Except Jamie, of course.

"One day you'll understand...And you. Teethcage. What's your name?"

"Uh, Yumi--"

Coco interjected immediately, hitting Yumiko in the face in the process.

"This is Yukiko Kurosawa, and she is the most miserable comedian alive!"

Maryam giggled, then tapping something into the little ID phone.

"How ironic! The funny lady is sadder than a Kentucky Derby racehorse that broke its leg."

Yumiko groaned. Coco was an impossible woman.

"Now where is Freckle Lord? I assume you bound him cleanly."

"Shelby let him go." Maryam shot Shelby a nasty look.

"...He asked me for help with teambuilding...I can't say no to that."

"He's a hateblogger, you don't just untie them."

"I find Norwegians rather intriguing. Like that guy Jenny is dressed as..."

"No matter!" Coco lifts up her comedic prisoner. "We will search for him!"

"Tell him Florges is a good supporter!"

"Shut up, Shelby!" Though Yumiko was being dragged away, she could hear someone, most likely Maryam, roughly bapping Shelby over the head. A resounding 'Ow!' echoed through tall buildings.

She sighed.

"Why d'ya care so much about me meetin' people?"

"Oh, the only way to leave this place is by befriending people."

"...That's stupid."

"Absolutely not, Kumagawa! Every human being desires another, or maybe two, or three others, or maybe seventeen if you're the sociable type! Those road barriers like Parker become depressed, and die years earlier than their time due to their pressing loneliness. It's a trust exercise for our feelings, and every day the bond grows."

Yumiko rolled her eyes.

"Who told you we had to become friends?"

"Inumami."

"You seriously trust Inumami? It's a talking dog."

"In dog, we trust. Besides, there's a four-floor mall here. What is there to complain about?"

Two automatic doors parted, and Yumiko Kurosawa was released into a massive yet surprisingly empty mall. The floors were pristine white tile, with Inumami's grinning image projected onto the empty spaces. Leather couches were littered here and there, spaced out by small tables with vases and such. It was a very expensive-looking building. Yumiko almost worried she wouldn't have enough money to so much as step in here.

"Very nice, no? Hark, I hear laughter up the stairs!"

Coco runs off, and Yumiko follows. What a bother. Though the escalator went slow, Coco managed to get into the controls under the railing and made it abnormally fast. It was like a horrific standup roller coaster that had no safety bars or rails. When she stopped the moving stairs altogether, Yumiko went careening off the damn thing entirely.

"I've fallen over too many times today..."

"Follow that noise!"

Yumiko slowly got to her feet and followed the fast-running Coco, who had slid into the nearest store -- A toy store, much to Yumiko's chagrin. Aside from Vaughn, and maybe Teshima since he acted like one, she knew there were no kids here. However, toy stores always reminded her of stupid children. She always hated kids. Even when she was a kid, she hated kids.

Maybe she just hated people in general. That sounded about right.

A few familiar faces resided in here, namely Jenny going through the DVDs section, no doubt in search of some cartoons. The laughter came from an immensely tall and muscular, platinum-haired male, next to an ambiguously-gendered decora weirdo wearing...rabbit ears?

That must be 'the rabbit' Teshima spoke of.

"Why are ocean fish always in the news?...Because fish are always 'current'." The rabbit spoke in a heavy monotone, as though he'd prefer to not exist at all. The other person, who Yumiko guessed was Fin-Fin, burst out into louder laughter.

"Y-you're too much! Really!"

"Did you mean...Eel-ly?"

This motherfucker had the loudest laugh Yumiko had heard in her life. The rabbit adjusted one of his hairclips, sliding it up through his flat, pastel-purple locks. "Here, read it yourself...I've got a case of anemia-related fatigue, I might even faint..."

"Oh! It's alright, then, you can take a break." The rabbit handed Fin-Fin a joke book, then stumbling about aimlessly. As a connoisseur of humor, Yumiko could proudly say that those were some of the worst puns ever. They were so bad, that she wasn't sure if the rabbit actually had anemia or if he just didn't want to read anymore of those crappy jokes. (Though, judging by his pallor, she assumed it was a cross between the two.)

"Sirrah!" Coco was already running towards the rabbit. "Kumagawa, come meet Viscount Rabbit-man!"

"Why am I a viscount...? By my luck, I should merely be a serf."

"What a pessimist...he's almost as miserable as you are! Misery loves company, yes?"

Coco lightly pushed Yumiko towards the 'viscount'.

"So, ehm...what's yer name?"

"Last name Nekoyama. First name Usagi. My life work is making indie RPG games, however, it has not quashed my heavy depressions. The heart yearns for something more, but alas, I am trapped in the spiraling vortex of anguish. You, having been described as 'miserable', may know this vortex yourself, yes?"

"...What the fuck?"

_Usagi Nekoyama : SHSL RPG Maker_

"Oh, I see...you're just casually miserable...True misery is hard to come by. My comrade Martin may be willing to speak with you." He motioned towards Fin-Fin, who was still snickering over the joke book.

"Thanks but no thanks, I'd rather not read him more mind-numbing puns."

"Agreed. If you'd like to play a game of wife-carrier though, look no further than him. He's dumb as a mule, but strong as an ox."

_Martin Laukkanen : SHSL Wifecarrier_

"Riiiight...Where can I get all of these hope shard things?"

"Show me your electro-ID."

"My...what?"

"That thing." He grabbed the little hope shard machine and began flipping through it. "Your objective question is 'Have you made someone laugh today'...and apparently you've made Maryam laugh a bit...Very nice. Let me correspond your contacts to mine since I've met everyone to fill my attention quota."

"I still can't understand a word you're saying."

"Let's see...Barton and Boonliang are in the Inumami Apartment gardens...Ishibashi is at the cafe, Mizuno is at the hardware shop on the mall's first floor, Matsuoka is in here somewhere, Masahiro has been traveling around for awhile, Dokuro is at the bath shop, and Bratland...Oh, where is he? He was doing my hair before-- Bratland!"

A gangly, freckled boy came into view, his eyes stuck in a permanent squint that alone made him suspicious. He crookedly edged over to Usagi, filing his bony fingers through the shorter boy's hair. Usagi returned the ID to Yumiko, who took it without breaking her stare with Bratland.

"And who are you?" Yumiko asked, still apprehensive. 

"Just a boy with a blog, deary, but you can call me Ingvar. Ingvar Bratland. My teachers say I'm intelligent, you know."

_Ingvar Bratland : SHSL Blogger_

"He may be a hate blogger," Usagi spoke once more. "but he does have a very calming voice, no?"

"...I'd turn you in to Coco, but I'm nice. And I honestly don't care what she and her little posse do anyway. Direct me to Matsuoka."

"He's behind you, giving bunny ears."

She turned around fast to see...a six-foot-tall boy, who was almost as pale as Usagi and looked twice as much like he hadn't slept in weeks. His hair was a deep blue, and his eyes were blacker than the night sky. 

"You shouldn't surprise people like that. Weren't you looking for your cousin?" Ingvar talked with disinterest, preoccupied by his work. For a moment, Yumiko wondered how soft Usagi's hair was, but she shook the idea off. That's just weird.

"I was bored..." He sounded sullen. Not monotone, but honestly sad. Yumiko then noticed he had a couple golden teeth. He looked like a member of the yakuza, which she didn't find particularly comforting. "I've always wanted to move to the palace of Versailles...King Tsuginori of Versailles..."

"You're rambling again, Matsuoka."

"Ah--! I was just thinking about Versailles..."

"I could tell. Don't speak so disjointedly, it makes people angry. Now shake hands with this fine young lady here."

"...You look like my mother..." He lightly pinched Yumiko's cheeks. "What's your name?"

"Yumiko Kurosawa," She spoke through stretched mouth. This boy was rather touchy-feely. "pwease leggo a' me."

"Oh, sorry..." He released her face, leaving a little pain in her barely-existent dimples. He then held his hand out, awaiting a shake. She smacked her hand into his and almost instantaneously felt a surprisingly strong shock. The static ran through her bones as though she were some kind of human lightning rod. 

He held his hand up, only for there to be a joy buzzer strapped to his finger.

"O-oldest trick in the book, hehe..."

_Tsuginori Matsuoka : SHSL Prankster_

"Jeez..." Yumiko wiped her hands off a bit, getting a lot of static shocks in the process. "Whatever, I'm leaving before Coco catches up to me." She looked off to her side, seeing the designer busying herself with talking to Martin.

She ran out of the store quickly and silently. Bath shop, hardware store. Too easy.

If only someone didn't run her down in the aisle right after she stepped out the door. Ten pounds of skirt, and another bony, though not pale girl with wide eyes and matted, dark hair. 

"You there! Missy!"

"Get off of me."

"I see it now, the gods are calling my name...We must get out of here, we are in grave danger! I see it, I see it!"

"You're weird..." She shoved the frantic lady off of her, the sound of her ID signalling that she had received another hope shard. She read it, and in the funny, bold kanji, it said the words. 'The Princess of God'. Also known as Masahiro Himeko. A cult leader.

_Himeko Masahiro : SHSL Prophet_

"My lady, please, listen to me--!"

"Sorry, but I don't associate with crazy people..."

Yumiko stamped away, leaving Masahiro on the floor in a big heavy skirt lump. She had the girl's hope shard, so what was the point in staying there, honestly? That girl was probably delusional, and she could see the bath shop from here, anyway.

It smelled like sugar and flowers. Yumiko considered, maybe, waiting until the person leaves. However, she decided to power through the stench of fancy bath products. Though it wasn't really her scene, if she could walk through the cheese aisle at a grocery store, this was nothing in comparison.

The girl stood in pink, button-up pajamas, filing through bath products and humming a little tune to herself. She, like Matsuoka, was pale. Abnormally pale. Her hands were practically white as a sheet of paper. 

"Hey."

"Ah--!" She dropped a powdery bath bomb on the floor, cracking it in half. Her hands moved quickly to her head, and she covered it. "I-I'll be good! Please don't hurt me! I'm sorry!"

"...I don't mean any harm." The girl looked pitiful, her nails chipped and her teeth missing. Her hair was purple, swooped over one eye, and she looked as though she hadn't slept in months.

"Oh..." Her hands dropped slowly. "H...hello."

"...I'm Yumiko Kurosawa."

"Sadako...D-dokuro." Her mouth peeled away into a weak, fearful smile. "I-I like it here because it smells like home..."

_Sadako Dokuro : SHSL Plush Toy Maker_

Her hands moved back to the powdery goods, rainbow colored dust decorating her milky white fingers. Yumiko decided it'd be best to leave her be. She seemed like a solitary bird, and perhaps, very traumatized as well. 

Next stop, downstairs hardware store. She felt a hand on her shoulder.

"C-can I come with you?"

She sighed internally. Right after getting Coco off her back, another person wanted to come with her. However, Dokuro was pitful, and she decided to nod yes. 

"I'm just trying to meet everyone."

"I wanted to, b-but...I got nervous, hehe..."

"'s okay, we've all been there."

The two walked out, into the fluttering light of the mall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i swear the introductions will be over next chapter i promise u


End file.
